VonJacqueline Sinfield|untapped glow blog|37 comments
- Fear, procrastination and a new job!
- ADHD and letting people down
- An Organized Home and ADHD
Do you wake up in the morning angry at the world? Does everything from the alarm clock to the smell of toothpaste drive you crazy? It might be a joke to say that you are "like a bear with a headache" in the morning. There is also a serious side, morning rage can cause a lot of problems, including breakups.
Common reasons why people with ADHD feel angry in the morning include:
Having a sleep deficit
75% of adults with ADHD have trouble sleeping. You may not get enough sleep or the quality may not be good, leaving you feeling tired in the morning.
Experience fear and worry.
If you wake up anxious or worried, you are more likely to be in a bad mood. 50% of people with ADHD also have an anxiety disorder, so it could affect you.
Living with ADHD is stressful, and waking up stressed also affects your mood.
Just work and don't play
Waking up and feeling like your whole day is work that can't wait can make you angry. Many people with ADHD feel like they don't deserve to have fun because they're behind on their responsibilities (homework, taxes, etc.), so their day is all about work.
Not everyone who experiences these points feels angry. Some people wake up sad or find it almost impossible to get out of bed.
6 tips to help you feel less angry in the morning
1. He is a detective
Do you get angry every morning? Or just during the week? If it's just weekdays, find out if it's the lack of good quality sleep that makes you angry or things related to your work day. Is morning rage something new or have you had it since you were little? If new, what has changed recently? When you have the answers to these questions, you can decide what changes you can make in your life.
Get moving and start your day as soon as possible. It gets you out of your head and you experience some early gains. Have a morning checklist so you don't have to think while your brain is still waking up. Get up, make your bed, eat somethingBreakfastbathing, dressing, etc.
3. Get out of the house as soon as possible
Some people find that the earlier they leave the house in the morning, the faster their anger dissipates. Even if you like your home, it helps to take turns starting your day. Packing your bags the night before helps you get out quickly.
Elaborateit's great for your ADHD. It also helps change your mood by flooding your brain with feel-good hormones. You can combine the 3rd and 4th by leaving the house and going to the gym.
5. Get more out of your life
We don't necessarily need to make big changes in our lives to get big results. Sometimes all it takes is a shift in perception and your mood changes too.
The 5 minute diaryis a great way to do this. It's also the perfect journal if you have ADHD as it only takes 5 minutes!
Bad mood can be associated with "slow sleep", which is a transition phase between falling asleep and waking up. It can take anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes, although some people find it can take up to 4 hours.
Try a few things to see what helps you wake up. Some people find coffee helpful, others would like to wake up gradually to a full spectrum wake up light.
What helps with your morning rage?
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Mateo Lucasat 22:22
I just found this site and WOW it's amazing. People avoid me in the morning, my partner hates me in the morning, I freak out until I drive to work. Now I'm working from home, so I need a new way to get rid of EVERYTHING that's bothering me.
I don't sleep well at all. I take pills to help but it's not enough. I wake up in the middle of the night with anxious thoughts. When I wake up in the morning, I feel like I haven't slept. My husband doesn't understand and it makes me very angry. Sleep like a baby every night. I usually wake up in the morning with a migraine. I'm moody and nasty. So I feel so guilty. Sometimes I wish I could drink something that never makes me wake up just to rest.
I've been to doctors and they don't help me. I'm tired of living like this. What makes it worse is that I don't have any weekends off, so there are no days I can sleep.
It is a chemical or hormonal imbalance.
take it to dr.
Check all hormones.
Full panel schilddrüse
vitamin D levels
Vitamin B6, B12, folic acid
nancyat 2:07 pm
The same thing happens to me every morning. To the point of waking up 2 hours before everyone else to get ready. From then until 3 am I'm fine. If after 3 you feel so depressed and anxious, it's that bad. I'm happy to feel that I'm not alone. I've been on meds for years, but I still have terrible moments every day. I hope everyone knows that we are not alone in this matter.
I have this too and have been for quite some time. I need 3-4 hours to be fully awake. Someone could say good morning to me and I would lose control. I'm the worst person ever. I punched my roommate when she tried to wake me up, I said some really mean things to her and I don't remember a thing. She's my best friend and I don't want to ruin our friendship. I do not know what to do.
Me too! I told my friend that after I wake up I need a 3 hour "grace period" where everything I say or do will be forgiven. Those first 3-4 hours are the worst for me. I would also lash out, say really mean things and act horrible if someone tried to wake me up early and I couldn't remember anything. I only hear it secondhand from the person as soon as I wake up and I feel really bad about it.
Also, I have to get up around 6 am. m. be at work by 7:30 am. m. and I don't feel awake, alert, or productive until around 10:30 am. hard to really do that much in one day.
gave meat 15:22
I go through this every day! I'm preparing to be expelled for having such a terrible problem. I hate myself so much that sometimes I don't even remember to scream or say anything. My future husband will not be because of this problem. People don't understand that I want to wake up on time and be happy like a normal person. I'm so sorry you're going through this. My situation got worse 10 times in the last 2 years. I'm going to see a sleep specialist next week, I can't live like this anymore. Literally because with 12° temperature I'll be homeless.
Talisman-Lagerat 1:31 am
I love reading this article. It's exactly happening to one of my friends. Exercise is great for ADHD
Hi, I don't usually wake up angry. I'm usually happy when I wake up. However, I get angry in the morning. A certain person doesn't understand that I have a morning routine or ritual. I tried to tell them well. The feeling of being stuck in a rut.
Kristen Grosseat 10:38
I totally understand what you are saying. My husband drives me crazy in the morning just by looking at me or kissing me good morning. I hate that.
susana huberat 11:02
I find that even though I'm an early riser and have a ton of things to do around the house and around the house (hi, pack it all up), I need to look at my three furry faces to remind myself to feed the domestic and wild cats and calm down and recover . my strong coffee under the belt, write something (more lists) and think about what is needed. It literally takes hours to get my emotions under control. I feel like I work too much and I'm jealous of the tourists who come and just have fun. Having to hibernate all the time, yes even on the west coast, really pisses me off because there is no help available. So it's no wonder someone says something insensitive about my lack of hearing or forgetfulness, or when I'm waiting in line for undecided people I feel like hitting someone! Then I realize others are struggling too and it's time for me to swim to start competing again... despite breaking one leg after breaking another leg which really sent me into a tailspin for 7 weeks. Exercising and talking to everyone helps me cope with things in my small community...as well as using Facebook to see what's going on in others' lives to get a better perspective of their mundane little world. We all need to learn from each other and be more patient (laughs)...it can be done. Thanks Jacquie for bringing it up... I actually thought it was just me feeling this way!
I've read a lot of reviews on here and it seems like I'm experiencing the same things. I have chronic depression and ADHD plus anxiety. I don't think I can wake up happy. I go to bed happy, I slept well, but then I wake up angry. It looks like it's about to explode. And the worst part is that I feel like my partner is getting the worst of it... I hate waking up and within minutes my good mood is gone. The air conditioning made the house very cold, I stepped on my toy kitten. Immediately indignant. And for no reason, I might add. I'm frustrated and I don't know what's wrong with me. I keep fighting with myself and I will lose my relationship.
Cristinaat 9:09 am
Hello, I have ADHD, I'm 23 years old.
My boyfriend and I have an old problem, when I wake up or he wakes me up, I'm this monster, a very bad and very rude person. I control it most days, but there are days I don't, like last night, I don't even remember or know what I'm doing. He usually picks me up or lets me know the next day, obviously very worried about what to do, with some recommendation
Joanna Qat 7:55 pm
I have the opposite problem. Although I wake up in a good or decent mood, when I try to fall asleep, my mood turns gloomy, so sometimes it's hard to fall asleep.
rileyas at 7:40
It happens to me all the time, just do something that makes you happy.
Lily-annaat 4:42 am
Hi, my ADHD partner sometimes wakes up angry as soon as he opens his eyes. It just can't handle normal requests etc. now... I feel like walking on eggshells in the morning and thinking before speaking or asking a question... arguments can go from 0 to 100 in a matter of seconds and I find myself defending myself. you wake up properly around 11 am. m. or after you're at work you forget it and at the end of the day you can be rational and say it's him in the morning angry. He smokes marijuana to treat himself. He runs a successful business and works a lot, but he smokes late into the night. Can this affect his morning mood? As a partner, I can't help but have this morning problem... I cried today, sometimes it's getting to be too much for me, but the other 90% of the time he's a wonderful partner, an amazing friend. He is currently not on ADHD meds, has a diagnosis but is not on treatment :( I need help, maybe I'll blog soon to share my story. Thanks for reading.
Your partner is not fully awake yet. He is in a semi-sleep state, although he appears to be awake. His pleas at this point may not overcome his desire to fall asleep, although this makes no sense as he does not reason properly while half-asleep. It also encourages you to take care of issues right away.
It might help to think of it this way. Your ADS partner is a "hunter" not a "gatherer". 1. His main brain is wired to wait for the serve and he lets his mind wander as he waits in silence. 2. If the house is attacked while it is sleeping, it is programmed to immediately go into a fight or flight to defend the family. Fast forward to now. Compare what you are asking to fight and defend the family against a predator. That's the analogy your sleeping brain makes when you ask: Did you remember to take out the trash? (I don't mean to belittle your needs, just a bad example)
It might help if you wake him up with the good stuff first. Then, when you know you're more awake, move on to the important stuff. You should also consider taking a one-hit first thing in the morning. His decision to self-medicate with marijuana is a common one. Low doses for people with ADD are very different from the general idea of being high.
Thanks for sharing, this is my husband 100% too. It's good to know I'm not alone. My husband is treated too, I try not to talk to him or bother him, but sometimes it's just a simple gesture that disgusts him. Sometimes it's a difficult situation. I am also happy with the answer given. It helps me to see things more clearly.
NKBat 8:35 am
I'm in more or less the same situation as you. My husband quit several times and I noticed a drastic change in his mood (for the better). It took a while, but after a month or two of not smoking, I was a different and MUCH more balanced person. He's smoking nonstop again and I'm about to leave. I've been trying to make redfish until my face turns blue and it doesn't seem to take anything into account. I suffer from anxiety and depression so I can understand his unwillingness to stop because he feels it helps him. BUT when he resigned, he admitted to me that after a few months of begging, his anxiety didn't seem that extreme at the time. I also noticed that the frequency of smoking has a lot to do with it. Sometimes when he only smokes once a day, if he smokes at all, he doesn't seem grumpy. If you smoke continuously all day every day, your attitude is unbearable.
Tambra Monroeat 4:45 am
My boyfriend says I go to bed angry, angry at the world. I wake up the same way I go to bed. I don't understand what's going on and why I'm doing this.
Aaronat 1:13 pm
Every morning I wake up and I'm so angry at the world, angry at everything for no reason. Life tires me. I literally wake up and from the moment I open my eyes I'm completely furious. This usually lasts 3-4 hours and in between that time I can be screaming, banging or hitting things around the house, thoughts running through my head, re-thinking things that have happened or could happen. My blood always seems to be boiling and I have no idea why. After these 3-4 hours, I calm down and don't remember anything. It's like I've just woken up, even though I've been awake for a while. This has been going on since I was a kid. I even yelled at him and yelled at a close family member face to face, but again I can't remember anything.
Any idea why?
Travisat 8:02 am
Honestly, I don't know enough about you to have a logical idea or reason why this is happening to you. Maybe I have a traumatic episode from your childhood that you don't remember. It could be a condition that runs in the family. It could be in the food we eat. It could be a chemical in the air. It could be many things, maybe I can help, maybe not, but if you want to talk more about it, we can try to get to the bottom of your problems and maybe you can help me with some of mine.
cristinafrom 9:54 am.
I have this problem with waking up angry. My mom also had this problem and I'm almost 100% sure your mom did too. The three of us were diagnosed with ADHD with a side of depression and anxiety. I don't know how to stop it because none of us were successful. My father resents my mother for this and my husband is starting to resent me for it. 🙁 I feel extremely guilty, but I don't know how to reduce the adrenaline that makes me act like it's morning. It's very depressing.
My girlfriend and I sometimes fight violently in the morning. She wakes me up and says she needs help with something and I immediately get mad. It takes me a long time to get up and do anything and when I do I end up dropping or dropping things to finish and take them out the door so I can go back to sleep. He usually doesn't ask for much and certainly nothing I would normally have trouble helping. I feel bad about it, but I can't help feeling that way when I wake up. Even if I try to remind myself that I'm in a bad mood when I wake up, it doesn't do anything to stop my feelings that I'm legitimately angry.
churchat 8:38 am
"Although I try to remember"... that's not true! I understand perfectly
Keriat 2:15 pm
I wake up feeling like my head is about to explode with rage. I really don't have to be angry. I finished. Need help. I've tried medication and nothing seems to help. My fiancée and I have been together for five years and he is almost ready to call it quits. I feel like I'm taking it out on him. I do not know what to do. I used to be a happy and friendly person and now I don't yell all the time or get angry about anything. Help!!!
Jacqueline Sinfieldat 5:31 pm
Hi Keri, I'm sorry to hear about your morning anger issues. There will be reasons why you feel angry, but you're still not sure what they are. Why not try! Every morning for a week, when you wake up, ask yourself, "Why am I angry today?" and write 10 reasons. Some might sound silly (the cat was snoring and kept me awake), but write 10 reasons anyway. After a week, you'll notice some common themes that you can take practical action on.
becaat 9:03 am
Because that sounds like a great idea to me, I also suffer from this demon, and some mornings you get so angry you don't even think about writing anything down. The rage is so strong that its stench fills the air I breathe and I transform into a werewolf. Literally screaming and spitting and dripping with sweat. There must be something chemical inside, so the comment about where the food we eat and the air we breathe could be the culprit. there are many factors...
Dani loverat 5:54 pm
I'm doing the same thing, I know better, because overall I'm happy with my relationship: I'm going to make an appointment with a doctor and find a way to treat my issues.
What did she say, Dr.
I've been struggling with the same issues for years now and it's driving me crazy 😡
Lisa Postonat 4:48 pm
Wow, sorry to everyone here with this problem. I am NOT alone but this issue makes me want to be alone because I feel sorry for my partner and I ALWAYS worry about how I am behaving around him. I prefer to be alone. I have really bad, dark, dark days where I don't even want to be on this planet. I'm really tired of life.
I'm angry at the world. I've been waking up so angry lately I can't even say good morning to my 5 year old daughter. I can't even be happy looking at them. I know I love her, why does my anger hide it? I hate that. I can't control it, it makes life harder.
janeat 8:14 am
I wake up in the morning with thoughts running through my head, and many of them make me very angry. For example, something my husband did or said that I feel is unfair. I feel like I have little reason to get out of bed. When I do this, I often try to feel calm, and sometimes I succeed. I do yoga and meditate a lot, but most of the time the thoughts don't clear. Many mornings I fight with my husband, it's like I can't help him. I think calming myself down before bed can help, because when I wake up it will be too late.
chelseaat 4:43 pm
wow thanks everyone, i really thought it was just me having this problem. I am currently single because my partners never understood why I wake up so angry at the world. I am currently on antidepressants but it is not helping. I've tried listening to meditation while listening to uplifting music, but there's still too much going on.
I have visited my doctor many times but I cannot find an answer as to why this is happening. His solution was to try antidepressants. I pray everyday for a solution to this problem as it has distorted my view of this beautiful world we live in. God bless you all and I hope we restore peace and harmony in our souls.
There are days I wake up and I don't feel love or feel like everyone is after me. I guess I'm mad at myself for not being the girly girl he wants and needs. I was 13, so I never cooked and dressed girls! I mean, I'll try anything for him, but it might be too late for that!
Jasmineat 11:50 am
Hey, I don't know what's wrong with me. I go to sleep well and wake up angry and wanting to take it out on my husband. The fact that our relationship is falling apart makes us realize. We sleep back to back, even he sees it in me the same way! We've been together for 2 years, but we've known each other since elementary school. I love this man with all my heart. I don't want to lose him because of my depression or anger. I tried talking to a medical professional and am being sued for just hearsay let alone taking medication. Does anyone know something I can try? This is my final result! Please help!
I've been with my fiance for 7 years and we've been back and forth in the mornings since we started. This was the worst problem in our relationship, especially as we get older and he is much calmer and more available to me. It almost makes me even worse waking up absolutely pissed off. I think if the two of you have good communication between the two of you he will understand and jump into action with you to help him. I completely understand his fear of leaving because of a tantrum he didn't even want to have. I can always have a free ear to listen 🙂